Post by ED on Feb 8, 2006 0:44:30 GMT -5
Once I decided I was good, damn, and ready I went outside and told Mrs Tribble to get inside and put some clothes on
As she woke up she got violent and threw a rock at me, I told her not to throw a rock at me women
Mrs Tribble finally went in and put clothes on and I got back to my sittin
Mrs Tribble came back in the room and told me she needed to tell me something
She said “when those aliens took me into the room, they fucked me, fucked me in the ass, that’s why it’s gapped”
I just sit there and shook my head, because I didn’t give a damn
I tell Mrs Tribble about being poked, stared at, having my glasses broken, and the aliens eating my hair
Mrs Tribble says “Maybe we should tell this to the class”
I then say they need to learn this stuff and learn how to get probed
I then say they need to know what these things look like so I will draw a picture before we head to Donner Springs
I take a paper and a pen and since I can’t draw good I will just draw a big circle with 2 black circles for eyes
I couldn’t draw well so I draw a box and lines for arms and I big dick in the middle
Then we headed to school
We get in the car and I drive while I drive Mrs Tribble is giving me head
We get to the teachers parking lot and we head to the classroom
Mrs Tribble goes to get the kids
When they come in they are looking at me and the one that gave me the dirty look said “Goddamn Edd and points to my dick and I realize it’s hanging out and I say your point is boy
The kid said “were not suppose to be seeing this in school I then grab it and put it back in
Class started and I went and sat in my chair by the card system
I got board so I pulled out my knife and started hacking at the wall
The kid that gave me the dirty look tells me I have issues
I then say I got a knife and you don’t
the kid then turned around
When recess came I went back to the kids desk, and I carved my name in it
After recess the kid comes to me and said “What’s wrong with you Ed
I then say Boy that is wood and I gave it a wielding
Nothing much happened until lunch and I needed more eatins so I went to the lunch room,and I stole food from the kid that looks at me wrong
He said Ed I paid for these
I reply well I didn’t and I then stole Bens Milk Carton
I then ran back to the classroom and started eating
The milk starts giving me problems so I stab it and pour it over my head drinking what went in my mouth
I then threw my trash in the kid that gave me the dirty looks desk
The kids are then brought back into the classroom
The kid that gave me a dirty look finds a leaking milk carton and he then throws it on the ground and gives me a dirty look
Mrs Tribble then says you don’t litter this classroom and made him move his card and I just laughed
While Mrs Tribble is teaching I see a UFO out the window, and I then start screaming and yelling and before anyone sees it the UFO flies off and the kid that gave me the dirty looks calls me a liar
I then call him a dirty little fuck and I grab his arm and tell him he will believe me
then Mrs Tribble separates us
Mrs Tribble starts teaching again and I see an unmarked military helicopter
I start screaming it’s the government and Mrs Tribble sees it to
She then yell's “oh hell fucking no not at my school
She grabs a stapler and runs down the hall
I then climb and fall out the window cause the helicopter is looking at me I jump out the window and runs to the helicopter and yell shit at it
We get past the backstop and jump the fence
We then yell at the helicopter and I yell I saw it I saw it
We jumped about 5 Wire fences and climb the mountain
Mrs Tribble yells you government trash and throws the stapler
It the files off to the north
We then walk back to the school and it took about 30 minutes
When we come back to the class we find Mr. Earnest yelling “where’s your fucking teacher
I tell him not to take that tone and he then tells us we can’t leave the class room
He then finally leaves
Mrs Tribble tells the class about being abducted by aliens
I then start by telling then about how we were fucking and how I tore that ass and how it was like a jackhammer into asphalt
We saw a beam and im on a table
Then one looked down at me and pulled out a giant rod
He then stuck it up my ass
The alien looked like he was enjoying it
And to tell the truth so was I
It got deeper and deeper unlit it pulled out
Once it came out I took a shit on his table
The one I pissed on looked offended again
I then showed the picture I drew and tell the kids to pass it around
When it got to the kid that gave me a dirty look he says he can draw a better picture and asked why it had 3 legs
I then reply that his dick son
The door then busted open and the 2 MIB’s walked in
The first one said you can’t tell them what didn’t happen
Mrs Tribble charges at the 2nd one then he pulls out the object and knocks her out
The first one tells them that he didn’t know what I told them and told the kids they saw a helicopter and that they were high and drunk
The second one pulled out the dirty sack and one of the kids yells that smells like crap
Ben says he didn’t see a helicopter and he saw a UFO
The first one says “if you want to exist you saw a helicopter
Ben says’ I saw a UFO”
The first one looks at the second and the second pulls out the object and knocks Ben out cold
Mr. Earnest runs in and “yells what is happening”
The first one says nothing is happening and pulled out the paper and told him to sign it
Mr. Earnest says he won’t sign it until he finds out who they are
The first one says that’s it you no longer exist and the second one ran up and knocked him out
While this is happening I pisses my sack and started yelling I piss my sack I piss my sack
The kid that gave me a dirty look says I don’t care and runs up and kicks me
I then get pissed off and try to charge at him, but I hit the projector and it falls on me
The MIB that don’t talk dragged Mr. Earnest, Ben, Mrs Tribble and I down the hallway
The MIB's put Mrs Tribble and Mr. Earnest on top of each other in the backseat, and me and Ben are thrown in the trunk
The car then drives off
